


Plain Blue Ink

by phantomdieb



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Defeat, Gen, It started as Shiratorizawa feelings and soon it became Ushijima feelings, basically like always, getting stronger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-19
Updated: 2015-12-19
Packaged: 2018-05-07 18:15:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5466140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phantomdieb/pseuds/phantomdieb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ushijima didn't expect this.</p><p>He didn't expect to lose to such a team as Karasuno.</p><p>And he surely didn't expect for it to hurt that much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Plain Blue Ink

**Author's Note:**

> Real super special thanks to my child [Arne](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Arne/pseuds/Arne) ♥  
> I love you

Ushijima didn't expect this.  
  
  
He didn't expect to lose to such a team as Karasuno.  
  
  
And he surely didn't expect for it to hurt that much.  
  
  
It wasn't really the fact that he had lost to that specific team, or that he lost at all. After all he had played strong teams before and he knew the bitter taste of defeat.  
The more Ushijima thought about it, the more sure he was that it was the fact that he was eliminated _so early_.  
  
  
The team already left the changing rooms, probably wanting to give him some space because he did seem angry earlier, even if he wasn't. He was frustrated. And this frustration was the reason was the reason for the first tear to drop.  
  
Ushijima wasn't a person who would cry because they lost a game. Even if they meant that they were out of the tournament. What did keep him crying was the feeling of frustration, and of shame.  
  
He felt like he had failed and disappointed his father. The only one he ever wanted to impress. The one who's opinion mattered to him the most.  
Sure, he hadn't seen his dad in what felt like forever, but that didn't stop Ushijima from absolutely admiring him.  
  
  
Ushijima's hands were shaking as he reached for his bag and opened it, taking out the t-shirt his father bought him at a volleyball game they watched together.  
  
Back then, when he was still a child, it was his favourite shirt and he was wearing it almost every day. He especially loved to wear it when his father taught him how to play volleyball.  
  
Ushijima always had that shirt with him, taking it to every single game. He never told anyone, but it was some sort of talisman. Not that he believed in something like that. But he felt calmer if he was able to look at it, maybe touch it, to realize his goals once again and letting that realization making him stronger.  
  
  
But right now, he pressed it to his face and sobbed into it. The tears staining that old shirt. Ushijima crumpled it in his hands in an attempt to stop his hands from shaking, when he suddenly felt something brush down his forearm. He looked up from the shirt, and to his horror he had to realize that it was a part of his shirt. His shirt just fell apart.  
Ushijima shouldn't be surprised by it. After all it was old and was used a lot over those years. Still, it was a shock to him. So he just stared at it, unsure what to do.  
  
  
He didn't remember how long he sat there, staring at his shirt, when a thought came to him.  
  
'What if this is a sign for me? A sign that says to stop playing volleyball for my dad and start playing for myself? Win for myself.'  
  
  
Ushijima bit his lip. He did play for himself as well. It wasn't that he was only playing to try to make his father see him. But it was a huge part of the reason he played. A really huge one.  
A sigh escaped Ushijima's lips as he wiped the rest of his tears from his face and stood up.  
  
  
He lost spring high to Karasuno. He couldn't change that. But he could try to influence the future.  
Get better.  
Get stronger.  
He would win next time again.  
  
Ushijima took a deep breath.  
A second.  
A third.  
  
  
He left the changing room with his head held high, his eyes focussed forward and giving off the feel of sheer confidence.  
  
He was Shiratorizawa's captain, after all.  
  
He was their _ace_.  
  
  
When he stepped outside, his team was waiting for him already. They smiled when they saw their captain approaching.  
They pushed aside the feeling of defeat for now, welcoming their captain back.  
But they wouldn't forget it. Forgetting would mean to not be able to learn from it. But that was what they intended.  
Learn. Get stronger.  
  
Win the next time.  
  
  
When the bus stopped at Shiratorizawa Academy, the whole team went to the gym.  
It was time for practice.

–

  
  
It was summer. University didn't start yet, but Ushijima had already moved to Tokyo. He lived in his own apartment now so it didn't confuse him when he got an anonymous box. Tendou did that often as he tried to surprise him and then denied that it was from him.  
He set the box on the small kitchen table and retrieved a knife to open it – when he suddenly froze.  
  
Because lying in there was a shirt.  
  
/That/ shirt.  
  
Except that it was new and bigger so that it would fit him.  
  
Ushijima swallowed when he took it out of the box and pressed it to his nose, taking a deep breath.  
He was lost in thoughts, as he was wondering who sent it to him. Because he now really doubted that it was Tendou who had sent him that box. After all he didn't know.  
  
It took Ushijima a while to notice the letter lying at the bottom of the box.  
  
  
Nothing flashy, just plain blue ink on white paper. The person sending him the box wishing him a Happy Birthday.  
Yet, once he came to finish the letter, tears streamed down his face and a smile found its way onto his lips. The letter was pressed tightly against his chest.  
Ushijima wiped away his tears so they wouldn't drip on the paper and ruin the letter.  
Then he raised it and read those words again.  
  
Those six little words that meant the world to him.  
  
  
_“_ _I am proud of you, son._ _”_


End file.
